Loneliness is part and parcel of being single. It happens. You go on Facebook and see everyone loving life, getting engaged/married/pregnant (on purpose) and you’re like “oh hey there season 5 of 30 Rock and low cal hot chocolate how you doing?” (That’s me right now – glamorous hey?)
I’m trying to rationalize and not feel down about the fact that I don’t have anyone on the horizon. Or feel down about the fact that after a couple too many tequilas I made a royal chop of myself trying to go for a guy who seriously was not interested *cringe*
I know that there’s someone out there destined to fall in love with me who I’m sure I will love with every fibre of my being. I knoooow he’s out there. But what if he’s on some obscure island that no one has ever heard of. Or worse – what if he’s in Joburg?!
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like absolutely no one is interested. There’s one or two (prob a couple more who would bang no hesitation) but that’s not what I am looking for at all. A good friend of mine told me to visualize my mr right and really be specific about it. And so far no one has come close enough. I hate feeling lonely but I would way rather be alone than settle. Oh and before you think I’m being too fussy I haven’t refined my list yet and it pretty much goes:
– no criminal record
– definitely single
– not a druggie
– has a job, car, place to live
– into fitness/health
– can braai and make steak.
See? That’s a pretty broad net.
I think I’m just a little worn down today because I look around and see so many people with their person. I know that I’m not supposed to judge my self worth based on my relationship status but it’s tough not to. I’ve met soooo many people this year alone and yet nothing has come of it. It’s easy to get despondent and get bleak about it – and I’m sure it’s perfectly normal to feel the way I do right now. I also know this feeling will pass. I just really needed to get this out of my head so I can sleep.
Here’s to being a topsy turvy single woman in Cape Town. Lord knows it’s not easy.